RIP HellBucket, Series 1 Rx-7. 1979-2009. You will be missed.

(just listen to the amazing Satchmo while you pay your respects, the images aren't important)

Dear HellBucket
HellBucket, over the many years we've known each other, we've rarely seen eye to eye. We bickered, we fought and we generally resented each other's presence in Pete's life. You were hot, temperamental, unreliable, painfully noisy and generally the bane of my existence. My many tantrums about you have seen you kicked, cursed and - some would say a little unfairly - given the moniker HellBucket, which has stuck fondly around since.
You were so low it was impossible to get in and out of you, particularly if I was in heels or you were parked in a gutter - and I didn't even attempt it if those two points were combined.
You were due for new tyres so we could actually make it around a corner in the wet without the wheels spinning madly and us staying in one place, and ever since you were broken into and the stereo was stolen I've had the pleasure of staring at a great big hole full of wires in the middle of the dashboard. Reaching gingerly in, we could press on one wire to turn the interior light on, and another we'd plug an ipod into to miraculously have some tunes in the car. Not that we could ever hear them over your engine noise and the windows down. Your aircon never worked, no matter what we tried, did it HellBucket.
But that said, you were our HellBucket, and we had some great times together. At the very least, now every time I get in the passenger seat of a newer car I feel like I'm in the future, in a space shuttle to the moon. And after so many years sitting at wheel height of the cars on the road around us, now being at eye level with other road users always prompts a "look at me I have a chair" type response.
So, after you broke down on the highway when Pete was on the way to work a few months ago, he got you towed out to the barracks. Turns out that you need a total engine rebuild or something, and turns out we're not going to pay more than your total value to make that happen. So you have been sold to another rotor head Pete works with, and yesterday I found out I'd never see you again. I cried Hellbucket, I really did, some bittersweet tears that you were gone and I never got to say goodbye.
Goodbye HellBucket, I hope the next 30 years of your life will be as good as the last. I hope you find joy with your new family and that you aren't immediately dismantled for parts. Though that would be kinda funny to see you nasty red bitch. I've dedicated this song to you, and just know you will forever be in my heart.

RIP HellBucket, Series 1 Rx-7. 1979-2009. You will be missed.